Is this it or .. ?

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Some meeting today did really shake me. Somehow, my mind got thrown back to my short message yesterday. It was about my prayer, asking for light and strength, whether stay put or to walk away. Neither was never been easy, and it feels I’m sitting in the middle.

Early e-mails today, somehow, lift up my mood. But, the meeting took it down again. Somehow it’s like I’m being told again, how long I’ve stuck these years. Further more, without anything significant I can be proud of. I think about (programming) languages, I’m thinking of switching (focus) into something new. I even think about how I’ve dreamed about being a game developer, and how much I’m still having such desire when I read gamasutra.com the other day. I was quite pessimistic though. Since I wonder there’re any game studio willing to employ a non C++ wizard.

Oh, I’ve dreamed about new hardware to play with, new boundaries to explore, about pushing limit, about answering “can we do it, how we do it”, about sharing, about feedback .. about something wicked cool I’ve lost from my feeling lately ..

Oh, I’m so far far far away from satisfaction land ..

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  • http://avianto.com/ avianto

    Well, sadly there is no other way. Learning C++ is a gateway to serious game developer industry. I am speaking as a lecturer of Game Design & Programming course and believe me, C/C++/C# is the only thing that matters in this field.

    (And no, I am not a C++ wizard also)

  • http://neofreko.com Akhmad Fathonih

    @avianto
    Hmm, if we believe that game is only about graphical stuff then I believe I have no future atm. However, looking at the trend, where people and game tend to be online and social (hint: MMO) then I might still have the chance. Back-end code does not necessarily have to be C/C++/C# right? Anything fast enough and scalable would be just fit, not?

  • http://tikabanget.com -tikabanget- â„¢

    i know someone who working at EA Games Singapore.. ^^
    want me to introduce u to him..?

  • http://neofreko.com Akhmad Fathonih

    @tikabanget
    Sure, why not? However, I don’t have much thing to offer other than lack of skills and friendship :D